If I were President…

February 15th, 2007

Not that I ever plan on running for office, but I have some ideas about how some things could change. My ideas might not be able to lower the National Deficit, end hunger, or make traffic run smoother. They are, my ideas for your consideration.Uncle Sam

If I were President – The important stuff:

*The Constitution would be THE LAW. All laws nullifying the Constitution or Bill of Rights laws would be voided and cleared from the books. Our founding fathers were not stupid.

*Our country was founded on faith. Denying American citizens the right to state the words “One nation under God” goes against the First Amendment. EVERYONE that is a U.S. citizen is allowed to honor their own religion. Christians are no exception.

*People would be allowed to be on Welfare for six months only. If the recipient hasn’t obtained a job within that time, they would be retrained to do a different job that is useful to their community (i.e. 911 operator, Roadside maintenance, Crossing Guard, School bus driver, Street sweeper, etc.) NOTE: My Mom was a postal carrier when I was a child. Many of the homes she delivered to were Welfare recipients that were waiting for their checks so they could go buy steak & beer. They even bragged about it to her. That just isn’t right.

*DWI violators on their FIRST offense would be required to work with Mothers Against Drunk Drivers or assist local hospitals in the care of car crash victims.

*Communities and/or citizens taking advantage of a catastrophe (i.e. Katrina) or a sports victory (i.e. basketball, etc.) and using this situation as an excuse to vandalize, loot, or harm others will be STRONGLY punished. Mandatory community service, heavy fines, and/or jail time will be enforced.

*Sexual predators would automatically be sterilized.

*School vouchers would be used. Whether you want to send your child to a private, public, or home school..you could do it.

*All celebrities that bash the United States (i.e. Johnny Depp, The Dixie Chicks, Alec Baldwin, Martin Sheen, Jane Fonda, Sean Penn, etc.) are more than welcome to relinquish their US citizenship. You have the freedom of speech and the right to your opinion. However, you would NOT be allowed to make millions of dollars by selling your movies to Americans. We have our opinions about YOU too.

*Lawyers bringing STUPID lawsuits to court (i.e. “I burned my mouth on a pickle from my McDonald’s hamburger) would be fined and disbarred.

*Cell phones would not be allowed while driving. PERIOD. The ONLY exception would be if your brake system failed or you were being chased by a stalker.

Just for fun/silly things to include:

*If a parent is doing a great job in public (i.e. correcting a whiny kid, expecting the respect towards others, etc.), they can be nominated by witnesses and recognized through media (either printed, audio, or visual) for their efforts. Bravo for you!

*All electronic toys (i.e. PS2, X-Box, Gameboys, etc.) would be TREATS. They wouldn’t be something that kids do INSTEAD of going outside and getting dirty. These toys would only be given to the child while having a lay-over at the airport, waiting at the doctor’s office, etc.

*Children would be expected to get AT LEAST two hours of outdoor play per day. (I truly believe that electronic toys, television, lack of playtime, and junk food are turning our children into obese adults) Get those kids out to play!

*The fashion trend of wearing an over-sized shirt to cover the fact that your pants are belted around your lower thighs is OUTTA HERE! That looks so stupid!

*The Salvation Army could ring their bell in any mall or large store they wanted around Christmas time. (Our bell ringer stopped this year because a mall patron was “offended” by the bell ringing. So sad..)

*Telemarketers would not be allowed to call after 5pm. No more disturbing you during dinner or a movie.

*Class reunions would no longer be held. (If you didn’t like them then, do you really think you will now?) If you want to be contacted by former classmates, you can join Classmates.com and be put on a list.

*Drivers over 65 yrs. would take driving tests EVERY year.

*Men that are losing their hair will be encouraged to shave their heads. It is completely voluntary, but encouraged. Comb-overs are unsightly and humorous. After all, bald men look TONS better than comb-over men.

*Farmers would be required to post what they are growing in a field (it always frustrated me when I couldn’t recognize a crop from the Interstate).

*Parents that bring crying babies into movies would be given a ticket for another showing and asked to leave.

*People would have the option to have their birthday off from work (and make up the hours before or after the date).

Leave a Reply

*